Defiant Teens are children that have no respect for authority and mainly disrespect their parents.
Back talk when your teenager rudely tells you that you are a tyrant or an idiot has to be one of the hardest things for parents to deal with. Respect for parents is highly valued in every culture. Ways of showing respect differ from family to family. Some require prompt obedience without any protest; others are more relaxed. But disrespectful behavior is a tough challenge regardless of the specific form it takes.
We have found that children that have Defiance Disorder are very confrontational and need to have life their own way. It is a trait that some teens experience through their puberty years. Defiant teens, disrespectful teens, angry teens and rebellious teens can affect the entire family.
You will find yourself wondering what you ever did to deserve the way your child is treating you. It is very sad, yet very real. Please know that many families are experiencing this feeling of destruction within their home. Many wonder "why" and unfortunately each child is different with a variety of issues they are dealing with. Once a child is placed into proper treatment, the healing process can begin.
Their bodies and ideas are often equally awkward and unfinished but their struggle to master both is fascinating. Negotiating their transition from childhood to adulthood means that we are all making adjustments. As is always the case, this stage of my children's development is making me continue my own growth in the ways I manage human relationships.
To get to self-direction, there are a few universal explanations for every one of the situations that follow.
First, our children need to understand and agree and the consequence for breaking it. Only when they come to agree with our rules, through their own internal dialogue, will they become self-directed.
Second, sometimes parenting strategy leads some problems. Are you over-controlling or over-protective? Either trait can elicit an externally directed response, as your children react to an unhealthy situation.
Third, remember for all these parenting challenges how important it is for you as parents, to model the right behavior. If you're expecting your children to act one way and you act another, then the system falls down.
Parents of teenagers describe the teen years as a time of change, fear, rebellion, moodiness, disrespect, and frustration. But they also say it can be a time of fun, growth, adventure, sharing, understanding, and learning. Research shows that one of the best things you can do for your teen is simply to be there for them. An effective way to work with defiant teens is through anger and stress management classes. If you have a local therapist, ask them if they offer these classes. Most will have them along with support groups and other beneficial classes.
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