Showing posts with label parenting tips. Show all posts
Showing posts with label parenting tips. Show all posts
5 Things You Will Regret About Parenting If You Don't Get it Right Now
Parents who died with many regrets are buried six feet deep. They didn't get it right while they lived no matter what nice things a pastor said about them. But you are alive and you still have time to get it right with your partner and children! Don't die with regrets, do what you can to parent children effectively and (God willing) they will thank you for your efforts later in life especially when they have their own children. Also, consider what a partner is telling you when it comes to parenting, not as disrespectful criticism, but as wise counsel.
So what might some parents being doing wrong right now?
1. Not spending enough time teaching children quality life lessons.
They can only learn but so much from television, educational devices, peers, teachers, and other relatives, but what about you? What have you shared with your children today to help them do well in school, stand up for themselves, get along with others, maintain a clean and organized atmosphere, and plan for the future?
2. Forgetting to note or record moving memories.
The action, image, or interesting thing a child says is right there and you did nothing. You didn't even bother to recreate the moment. Value it! Most likely, what moves you now will move you later in life and who knows, be a life lesson for your son or daughter during a challenging time. So have your recording device ready or jot down what you heard.
3. Saving money for education or other child-related goals.
You know there are things you want them to do and they have shared with you goals, so what financial backing are you giving them other than lip service? Don't be upset later in life when they aren't giving their all to something or forgot about dreams, you didn't pay for them! You were too busy to research, and you didn't bother to network with others. Parents and children that are above average go beyond daily responsibilities and find out what path they can put children on that will help them achieve personal goals while being productive members of society. What could you put in the Google search engine this day that will help direct you and your children?
4. Establishing healthy partnerships with extended relatives.
So many parents overlook those relatives who are not in their circles. There are second and third cousins, great aunts and uncles, and other family members who just might add value to your children's upbringing, yet you don't bother. A simple letter with a photo will get a relationship going. Attending a celebration or family reunion will build new connections. These days DNA analysis will also help bridge gaps since Ancestry.com will connect you with relatives you didn't even know you had. There is also Facebook too. So look beyond your circle, not everyone is bad in your family, in the exes, on your mom or dad's side, and others!
5. Showing love, kindness, generosity, and patience on a consistent basis.
Days will come and go some good, some bad. You will need to discipline, correct, admonish, and more in your household. However, your teachings will go a long way when you are loving, kind, and patient. You will also need to be generous especially during times when the world has treated partner and children unkind. Practice healthy ways of expressing love in your household and you will get it back sooner or later. However, walk around with an iron fist and one day, everyone will want to overthrow the king or queen. You might feel like everyone is against you now, think about what you are saying and doing to the relatives for them to want to build a coup against you.
There have been many generations blessed over the years because families put differences aside and they worked together. They made right connections and severed the toxic ones. They focused on achieving goals and did what they could to make family work. If you love your family, you will do what you can to bring peace to your home. It would be a pity to have such wisdom, but do nothing and end up on a death bed full of regrets, don't let this happen to you!
Nicholl McGuire shares spiritual insight on YouTube channel: nmenterprise7.
So what might some parents being doing wrong right now?
1. Not spending enough time teaching children quality life lessons.
They can only learn but so much from television, educational devices, peers, teachers, and other relatives, but what about you? What have you shared with your children today to help them do well in school, stand up for themselves, get along with others, maintain a clean and organized atmosphere, and plan for the future?
2. Forgetting to note or record moving memories.
The action, image, or interesting thing a child says is right there and you did nothing. You didn't even bother to recreate the moment. Value it! Most likely, what moves you now will move you later in life and who knows, be a life lesson for your son or daughter during a challenging time. So have your recording device ready or jot down what you heard.
3. Saving money for education or other child-related goals.
You know there are things you want them to do and they have shared with you goals, so what financial backing are you giving them other than lip service? Don't be upset later in life when they aren't giving their all to something or forgot about dreams, you didn't pay for them! You were too busy to research, and you didn't bother to network with others. Parents and children that are above average go beyond daily responsibilities and find out what path they can put children on that will help them achieve personal goals while being productive members of society. What could you put in the Google search engine this day that will help direct you and your children?
4. Establishing healthy partnerships with extended relatives.
So many parents overlook those relatives who are not in their circles. There are second and third cousins, great aunts and uncles, and other family members who just might add value to your children's upbringing, yet you don't bother. A simple letter with a photo will get a relationship going. Attending a celebration or family reunion will build new connections. These days DNA analysis will also help bridge gaps since Ancestry.com will connect you with relatives you didn't even know you had. There is also Facebook too. So look beyond your circle, not everyone is bad in your family, in the exes, on your mom or dad's side, and others!
5. Showing love, kindness, generosity, and patience on a consistent basis.
Days will come and go some good, some bad. You will need to discipline, correct, admonish, and more in your household. However, your teachings will go a long way when you are loving, kind, and patient. You will also need to be generous especially during times when the world has treated partner and children unkind. Practice healthy ways of expressing love in your household and you will get it back sooner or later. However, walk around with an iron fist and one day, everyone will want to overthrow the king or queen. You might feel like everyone is against you now, think about what you are saying and doing to the relatives for them to want to build a coup against you.
There have been many generations blessed over the years because families put differences aside and they worked together. They made right connections and severed the toxic ones. They focused on achieving goals and did what they could to make family work. If you love your family, you will do what you can to bring peace to your home. It would be a pity to have such wisdom, but do nothing and end up on a death bed full of regrets, don't let this happen to you!
Nicholl McGuire shares spiritual insight on YouTube channel: nmenterprise7.
7 Things Small Children Do that Irritate Most Adults
Anyone who has children most likely has a long list of stories where one’s child was acting mean-spirited to family, abusive to other children, and worse, destroyed various parts of the household. As sweet and innocent as small children appear to be, they need to be trained, trained and trained some more! Children require a lot of attention and time and when one knows that he or she has very little of either why bother having children or continue having children? Of course, there are those unexpected surprises, but one has nine months to get his or her business straight mentally and physically to ensure the well-being of one’s baby before he or she arrives.
For adults who are often busy with work, hobbies, or other things non-family related, parenting children will be a challenge. There will be those days that no one’s advice is going to work, you just have to go on one’s gut feeling, heavenly Father, or ride the rollercoaster of your child’s emotions. No easy way out!
Workplace responsibilities must be put on hold at times, so that a parent can take a child to his or her doctor’s appointment. Television watching will be interrupted when there is some yelling going on in the next room from sugar-hyped children. Events will be canceled when children are misbehaving so badly, that a parent feels like his or her head is going to pop off.
Sometimes bad times will far exceed good times and don’t let a naive, inexperienced, “I’m so in love with children” type tell you any differently. But we, parents, rebound from every challenge set before us, don‘t we? We find ways to get the peace we need after a storm. From popping a pill for a bad headache to taking a long walk or drive, we find ways to temporarily escape crazy moments until we can clear our minds. Moments are just moments they don’t last always! Storms don’t stick around, they eventually go away.
One thing, those of us who have been at parenting awhile will not do is, judge a person for wanting to leave family sometimes. Irritations pile up, and when they go beyond capacity that is when marriages fail, people walk out of homes, children are abused, spouses are mistreated, etc.
Whether one is traveling for the job, vacationing with the girls on a cruise, or hanging out with the fellows at a sporting event, we can’t blame you for wanting to protect your sanity. Maybe if more people knew how to get away from children, before taking out frustrations on a partner, abusing the family, or worse murdering them, there would be more lives spared.
So what are some of those things that frustrate some adults, more than others, and how might we get a handle on some of these issues?
1. Whining.
Most children whine because their needs are not being met. For example, Dad didn’t get the toy his son wanted. Mom didn’t pour juice in her daughter’s favorite cup. The driver of the car didn’t stop at a family restaurant to get Junior something to eat. So the children whine and whine and whine--no tears just annoying noise! A high pitch voice that is so irritating to the point that a parent who typically doesn’t yell will turn around and say, “Will you shut up!? Just shut the bleep up!” Sometimes all the whining was nothing more than a sleepy, hungry child. You have to stop and think, “When was the last time I took my child to the bathroom, gave him or her something to eat, and let my poor son or daughter take a nap peacefully?”
Solution: Always have goodies on hand and small toys in tote. Give your children a treat or toy that will distract them when you know you can’t meet their needs for the moment. When you have nothing, point out something interesting and begin to talk about it while rubbing the child’s shoulder. Sometimes a little tickling of one’s ribs or toes is a great distraction. Laughing is always better to listen to than whining!
2. Crying for long periods of time.
From a pain in a child’s ear to gas bubbles in a full belly, a child will cry and cry and cry. Something hurts! Maybe a favorite parent or relative left and the poor child can’t bear the separation. Whatever the case, soothe the child for as long as you can tolerate the crying. Babies can be held, toddlers can be walked, older children can be instructed to take deep breaths while they cry. The quick breathing exercise for older children will shorten the crying. Try different things to console children who are upset.
Solution: When you are at your wits end, remove yourself from the crying child. Place the child safely in a crib without anything in it or put your son or daughter in his or her room while you go somewhere in or around the home so that you can calm down. Sometimes calling a fellow parent and sharing your frustration can be a help.
3. Act out with parents and caretakers such as: hitting, biting, kicking, and spitting.
Children doing anything that hurts those who are watching them will make some adults very upset. A slap to the face, a kick to the shin, or a toy being hurled at one’s head is enough for a child to be punished. The toy is taken away, some parents will spank, and others will put children in time-out. When a child doesn’t get whatever he or she is asking for, most parents and teachers will isolate him or her from others. There are many things a parent can do to ensure that they are in control of the household and not the child who has only been on this planet for less than five years.
Solution: When a child is acting out this badly often, surely a parent should consider taking the child to a mental health doctor. It just isn’t typical of most children to want to fight adults. But if the children have been abused in some way, they will lash out terribly.
4. Touch things after repeated instructions not to.
How many times does a parent have to keep telling a child not to touch something? For as long as it takes for the child to learn that when mom and dad says, “No!” They mean, “No!”
Solution: No matter how frustrated you get, do the kinds of things that will show the child that it is wrong to touch certain things. So if you have to block a certain area of your home off, do it. Rearrange some things or pack up others until he or she is older, do it! If telling your child repeatedly not to do something is grating on your nerves, take a time out for yourself and plan how you are going to make the environment less stressful for you and your child. People who are stubborn and refuse to move anything or rid themselves of so much stuff decorating their homes are the ones who tend to get the most upset about curious children. Watch people like this, they might lose it.
5. Exaggerate an accident, tell false stories.
Children will say that a sibling, “…did this and that…” and cry their eyes out while telling you about it. But then you find out later, what had happened wasn’t as bad as the child made it sound.
Solution: Before jumping to conclusions, investigate. When you realize your child is the exaggerating type instruct him or her on sticking to the facts, by having them repeat the story and then you point out where he or she is not being accurate. Of course, you will have to explain in such a way that a child can comprehend what you are saying. Use visuals to help such as books that teach children why lying is wrong.
6. Avoid eating certain foods.
No matter what you say or do, when a child’s mind is made up on what he or she is going to eat--that’s the end of it. No amount of persuasive techniques will help in the long term. Sometimes you just might get a child to eat this thing and that thing in the short term, but old habits tend to return periodically. You can talk until you are blue in the face about how the child ate fruits and vegetables last week with no problem while you continuously put a spoon in his or her mouth, but when they don‘t want eat all of something or none at all, don’t force them. Otherwise, before long, you will have food everywhere and a red-faced child crying about “…not wanting it!” while you are tossing a dish or two in the sink screaming, “I give up!”
Solution: You might want to try cooking certain foods in a different way, buying alternatives, or using someone else in the family to coax your child into eating particular meals.
7. Fight with siblings.
This last irritation of many parents is one that will occur throughout childhood. Today brothers and sisters love one another, but tomorrow, not so much. Parents are called into bedrooms, living rooms, basements, and everywhere else because, “He hit me…She touched me…I hate her…He bit me…”
Solution: Stop allowing children to be in the same space playing with their toys and electronics for hours on end especially without parental supervision. Place them in separate areas of the residence for a time where they can play with favorite toys without watchful siblings and then rotate.
Parents who are easily frustrated and short-tempered are simply not the best teachers and one who recognizes this about a parent shouldn‘t leave children with this person especially for long periods of time. Selfish parents with various mental disorders are usually irritable when in the presence of children. Most can pick up on an adult’s tension. You will notice the change in your child’s behavior when he or she starts to act strangely around certain individuals--don’t ignore the signs! Many children know when they are not liked very much. This is why some will cry, fuss and whine if you should drop them off with troubled relatives.
When you know mom, dad or both can’t handle their children, say something, offer assistance, direct them to some help, and most of all (for those who have a faith) pray for them. Avoid leaving children with relatives and friends who have very little patience and time to watch them. Don’t bring children to events when you know that they are challenge to watch. Otherwise, you will only make others irritated with you and your misbehaving children.
If you know that your children are driving you up the wall, it is time to put yourself on vacation. Share your issues with those who can help you personally and professionally. Whatever you do, don’t take out your misery on a child who didn’t ask to be in this world. God bless.
For adults who are often busy with work, hobbies, or other things non-family related, parenting children will be a challenge. There will be those days that no one’s advice is going to work, you just have to go on one’s gut feeling, heavenly Father, or ride the rollercoaster of your child’s emotions. No easy way out!
Workplace responsibilities must be put on hold at times, so that a parent can take a child to his or her doctor’s appointment. Television watching will be interrupted when there is some yelling going on in the next room from sugar-hyped children. Events will be canceled when children are misbehaving so badly, that a parent feels like his or her head is going to pop off.
Sometimes bad times will far exceed good times and don’t let a naive, inexperienced, “I’m so in love with children” type tell you any differently. But we, parents, rebound from every challenge set before us, don‘t we? We find ways to get the peace we need after a storm. From popping a pill for a bad headache to taking a long walk or drive, we find ways to temporarily escape crazy moments until we can clear our minds. Moments are just moments they don’t last always! Storms don’t stick around, they eventually go away.
One thing, those of us who have been at parenting awhile will not do is, judge a person for wanting to leave family sometimes. Irritations pile up, and when they go beyond capacity that is when marriages fail, people walk out of homes, children are abused, spouses are mistreated, etc.
Whether one is traveling for the job, vacationing with the girls on a cruise, or hanging out with the fellows at a sporting event, we can’t blame you for wanting to protect your sanity. Maybe if more people knew how to get away from children, before taking out frustrations on a partner, abusing the family, or worse murdering them, there would be more lives spared.
So what are some of those things that frustrate some adults, more than others, and how might we get a handle on some of these issues?
1. Whining.
Most children whine because their needs are not being met. For example, Dad didn’t get the toy his son wanted. Mom didn’t pour juice in her daughter’s favorite cup. The driver of the car didn’t stop at a family restaurant to get Junior something to eat. So the children whine and whine and whine--no tears just annoying noise! A high pitch voice that is so irritating to the point that a parent who typically doesn’t yell will turn around and say, “Will you shut up!? Just shut the bleep up!” Sometimes all the whining was nothing more than a sleepy, hungry child. You have to stop and think, “When was the last time I took my child to the bathroom, gave him or her something to eat, and let my poor son or daughter take a nap peacefully?”
Solution: Always have goodies on hand and small toys in tote. Give your children a treat or toy that will distract them when you know you can’t meet their needs for the moment. When you have nothing, point out something interesting and begin to talk about it while rubbing the child’s shoulder. Sometimes a little tickling of one’s ribs or toes is a great distraction. Laughing is always better to listen to than whining!
2. Crying for long periods of time.
From a pain in a child’s ear to gas bubbles in a full belly, a child will cry and cry and cry. Something hurts! Maybe a favorite parent or relative left and the poor child can’t bear the separation. Whatever the case, soothe the child for as long as you can tolerate the crying. Babies can be held, toddlers can be walked, older children can be instructed to take deep breaths while they cry. The quick breathing exercise for older children will shorten the crying. Try different things to console children who are upset.
Solution: When you are at your wits end, remove yourself from the crying child. Place the child safely in a crib without anything in it or put your son or daughter in his or her room while you go somewhere in or around the home so that you can calm down. Sometimes calling a fellow parent and sharing your frustration can be a help.
3. Act out with parents and caretakers such as: hitting, biting, kicking, and spitting.
Children doing anything that hurts those who are watching them will make some adults very upset. A slap to the face, a kick to the shin, or a toy being hurled at one’s head is enough for a child to be punished. The toy is taken away, some parents will spank, and others will put children in time-out. When a child doesn’t get whatever he or she is asking for, most parents and teachers will isolate him or her from others. There are many things a parent can do to ensure that they are in control of the household and not the child who has only been on this planet for less than five years.
Solution: When a child is acting out this badly often, surely a parent should consider taking the child to a mental health doctor. It just isn’t typical of most children to want to fight adults. But if the children have been abused in some way, they will lash out terribly.
4. Touch things after repeated instructions not to.
How many times does a parent have to keep telling a child not to touch something? For as long as it takes for the child to learn that when mom and dad says, “No!” They mean, “No!”
Solution: No matter how frustrated you get, do the kinds of things that will show the child that it is wrong to touch certain things. So if you have to block a certain area of your home off, do it. Rearrange some things or pack up others until he or she is older, do it! If telling your child repeatedly not to do something is grating on your nerves, take a time out for yourself and plan how you are going to make the environment less stressful for you and your child. People who are stubborn and refuse to move anything or rid themselves of so much stuff decorating their homes are the ones who tend to get the most upset about curious children. Watch people like this, they might lose it.
5. Exaggerate an accident, tell false stories.
Children will say that a sibling, “…did this and that…” and cry their eyes out while telling you about it. But then you find out later, what had happened wasn’t as bad as the child made it sound.
Solution: Before jumping to conclusions, investigate. When you realize your child is the exaggerating type instruct him or her on sticking to the facts, by having them repeat the story and then you point out where he or she is not being accurate. Of course, you will have to explain in such a way that a child can comprehend what you are saying. Use visuals to help such as books that teach children why lying is wrong.
6. Avoid eating certain foods.
No matter what you say or do, when a child’s mind is made up on what he or she is going to eat--that’s the end of it. No amount of persuasive techniques will help in the long term. Sometimes you just might get a child to eat this thing and that thing in the short term, but old habits tend to return periodically. You can talk until you are blue in the face about how the child ate fruits and vegetables last week with no problem while you continuously put a spoon in his or her mouth, but when they don‘t want eat all of something or none at all, don’t force them. Otherwise, before long, you will have food everywhere and a red-faced child crying about “…not wanting it!” while you are tossing a dish or two in the sink screaming, “I give up!”
Solution: You might want to try cooking certain foods in a different way, buying alternatives, or using someone else in the family to coax your child into eating particular meals.
7. Fight with siblings.
This last irritation of many parents is one that will occur throughout childhood. Today brothers and sisters love one another, but tomorrow, not so much. Parents are called into bedrooms, living rooms, basements, and everywhere else because, “He hit me…She touched me…I hate her…He bit me…”
Solution: Stop allowing children to be in the same space playing with their toys and electronics for hours on end especially without parental supervision. Place them in separate areas of the residence for a time where they can play with favorite toys without watchful siblings and then rotate.
Parents who are easily frustrated and short-tempered are simply not the best teachers and one who recognizes this about a parent shouldn‘t leave children with this person especially for long periods of time. Selfish parents with various mental disorders are usually irritable when in the presence of children. Most can pick up on an adult’s tension. You will notice the change in your child’s behavior when he or she starts to act strangely around certain individuals--don’t ignore the signs! Many children know when they are not liked very much. This is why some will cry, fuss and whine if you should drop them off with troubled relatives.
When you know mom, dad or both can’t handle their children, say something, offer assistance, direct them to some help, and most of all (for those who have a faith) pray for them. Avoid leaving children with relatives and friends who have very little patience and time to watch them. Don’t bring children to events when you know that they are challenge to watch. Otherwise, you will only make others irritated with you and your misbehaving children.
If you know that your children are driving you up the wall, it is time to put yourself on vacation. Share your issues with those who can help you personally and professionally. Whatever you do, don’t take out your misery on a child who didn’t ask to be in this world. God bless.
TIP: Teacher Tip for Mom-MSN Living-Mom’s Homeroom
Ask your child, "What are you learning in school?" Click on link:
TIP: Teacher Tip for Mom-MSN Living-Mom’s Homeroom
TIP: Teacher Tip for Mom-MSN Living-Mom’s Homeroom
Staying Calm: Tips for Parents
My beloved car had just blown its engine, pregnancy was making
me crazy, and we had no money in our pockets (or anywhere else).
When I slammed our front door, I knocked the only plant I had
managed to keep alive all season off the windowsill. Just as
the pottery hit the floor and cracked, so did I. I lay face
down in black potting soil and pottery shards and let my Labrador
lick the tears off my dirty face.
That was just before the birth of our first child. Since
then, there have been countless times when I've wanted to
curl up on the carpet and scream, but the ever-watching kids
have made that a luxury I can no longer afford.
It's more difficult now, too. One of the biggest surprises
of parenthood is the absolute anger we
can feel in no time - and with very little provocation.
Start with a sleep-deprived parent, throw in a troubled
teenager, a whining child, or a colicky newborn, and even
the coolest cats can lose their minds.
Releasing our anger in the wrong ways can lead to emotional
and physical scars on our kids. When infants are shaken,
even for one heated moment, they can die. And it takes only
a moment to harm their little souls.
As they watch us, these young ones are paying particular
attention to the way we handle difficult situations. And
what we model for them will, in large part, determine their
success at controlling their own tempers as they grow up.
So, even in the face of total exasperation, we must stay
calm. For a long time, the advice has been to simply go
away for a moment and count to ten, but, as all parents know,
sometimes that's not so easy. A small child may be
frightened when mommy or daddy leaves to take a time-out. Sometimes
counting to ten just doesn't do it, and there's no time
to count to 100.
So here are a few more tips, compiled just for parents, to
help you deal with anger and stay calm with your kids.
PREVENTATIVE MEASURES
The best time to work on staying cool is before you're hot.
*Declare a zero-tolerance policy on the out-of-control temper.*
You must decide, for yourself, that behaving this way is
simply not okay. Remind yourself that it is possible to manage
your emotions. Think back to times when you were successful at
controlling your anger. Perhaps you bit your tongue rather
than hollering at the boss. Or you were just about to let it
fly at your husband when your in-laws called and suddenly you
couldn't believe the sweetness of your own voice. We all
have the power to suddenly change our mood.
*Be prepared.* Lots of things can go wrong each day; be ready
for them. For example, if you've got babies, pack a bag with at
least one extra shirt for everyone, a complete outfit
for each toddler, and several for the infants. Stow them in the
back of the car with extra diapers and plenty of baby wipes.
*Is there anything specific that triggers your anger?*
Keep a journal for those times when you feel like you're ready to
fly off the handle. Do you notice any patterns--time of day,
hunger level, lack of exercise, a full calendar? Even noise
from a TV or radio can contribute to a feeling of over-stimulation,
which can set off an emotional explosion. Create a nurturing
environment for yourself.
*Take care of yourself.* We're more likely to react to a situation
- rather than to simply act - when we haven't gotten enough
sleep or we haven't been eating right. Start your day with a light
breakfast that includes carbohydrates and protein. Then continue
to eat for energy throughout the day.
*Daily exercise* provides a physical release to help you control
anxiety and aggression throughout the day. A half-hour of
kickboxing can release tension you didn't even know you had.
*A regular routine of prayer and meditation* can calm a chaotic
mind. Sit quietly for at least 15 minutes a day. Practice a
few yoga stretches when things get tense.
*Decide how you'll deal with certain situationS before they arise.*
What makes you want to blow your top? Whether it's toddler temper
tantrums or the preschooler's occasional whine, determine how you
will handle those things beforehand - while you're calm.
*Understand your child.* Read up on child development and put
yourself in their shoes. Ask yourself: "What's it like to be
two and not have the skills to express what you want?" "What's
it like for a newborn who finds herself with a gut-wrenching
bellyful of gas and doesn't understand why it hurts?" Kids
act the way they do for a reason. Often, there's a developmental
milestone associated with a child's behavior. Understanding the
reasons behind our kids' actions can go a long way in helping
us develop a sense of empathy, compassion and, ultimately,
tolerance.
IN THE HEAT OF THE MOMENT
*Take a few deep breaths.* Diaphragmatic breathing helps reduce
stress. This will also give you a time-out, long enough to make
a rational assessment of the situation and to help you regain a
sense of control.
*Visualize* yourself as the cool, calm, person you strive to be.
Whom do you know who embodies these traits? Imagine this person's
reaction to the situation.
*Stop. Think. Then speak.* Remind yourself of the importance of
keeping yourself under control. If you feel anger building inside,
don't pick up a baby. Ask for help or wait until you are calm.
*Consciously lower your voice.* Yelling will only make a child
angry and defensive, and it can scare a young child. A soft
tone says you're in control.
*Don't catastrophize.* Resist the temptation to blow something
out of proportion. Avoid using the words "always" and "never"
when you talk to yourself and others.
*Distract yourself.* Is there any way you can laugh about the
situation? Ask yourself: what is the real significance of the
situation that triggered my rage? It's more important to
model a healthy approach to stress than it is to win certain
battles. Choose those battles carefully.
Afterwards, reinforce your love for the child and retreat to
assess the way you handled the situation. What did you do
right? What will you do differently next time?
About the author: Susie Cortright is the founder of momscape.com - http://www.momscape.com - a website devoted to helping busy parents find balance. Read her reviews about behavior modification programs, including programs designed to help you eat for health and enjoy exercising here:http://www.momscape.com/thinkrightnow/reviews.htm |
Parenting Tips For When Kids Talk Back
Many mental health specialists and those that specialize in child care will attest to the fact that when kids talk back it is a type of behavior is considered to be "learned". This is, in many cases, an outright disrespect for authority and should be dealt with accordingly. Here, I will provide some helpful information and insight on this topic, as well as some basic techniques to cope when kids talk back.
Problems in Stopping the Back Talk
Every single day, there are adults everywhere who are at their ends wit when it comes to trying to stop kids from talking back. If you face this challenge, it is essential to know and understand that it is not appropriate to give into this type of behavior. It is considered to be highly disrespectful and disrespect should not be tolerated in children. If it is tolerated, the child will grow to develop many different types of emotional and behavioral problems. If you are having problem in stopping the back talk, it is important to evaluate your response to this behavior, as well as the responses of others. It is then that you can develop a plan to put a stop to this type of verbal disrespect.
Common Reasons for Talking Back
There are many different reasons why a child may talk back. The following list details some of the reasons why this may occur:
1. If a child is talking back, it is important to observe the behavior of the adults in the home. It is a known fact that many children model themselves after the adults that they come in contact with on a daily basis. Do the adults in the home exhibit a smartallic conversational tone? Do these individuals become loud and obnoxious? If this is occurring in the home, it is quite possible that the child is not the one to blame, but the adults in the home are. Appropriate behavior modification should be implemented in order to adjust to that which is acceptable.
2. If the parents and other adults around the child who is talking back often "gives in" to the behavior of the child, the kid will use this to their advantage. They will gain a certain level of control by back talking and being quite obnoxious about it. Children should grow to learn that "no" is no, and that they will not always get their way.
3. Many children who do not feel as if they get any attention from their parents may begin to talk back to adults in order to acquire attention - even if it is negative. To a child, negative attention is better than no attention at all.
How to Handle Back Talk
There are many ways that you can handle back talk if you are on the receiving end as an adult. The following details some of the methods that have been found to be effective in this type of situation:
1. If a child starts to back talk you, you should hold them accountable immediately and then follow up on this accountability by informing that their actions are unacceptable and will not be tolerated. Stop the behavior in its tracks and make sure they take you seriously when you do this. This means backing up what you say, when you say it.
2. Many children will talk back to an adult to simply get an argument going. If your child does this, you hold them accountable, and they continue to engage in the behavior, simply ignore them. When they see that their ability to control and manipulate you just is not working, then eventually the behavior will die out completely.
3. If your child back talks and you observe them being respectful in conversation later, you must ensure that you point this out and encourage them to act in this manner more often. Eventually, they will come to a point where they want to please you.
Conclusion
When kids talk back, it is a complicated experience. However, it is a behavior that can be modified. By understanding what causes it, and how you can correct it, you can easily bring about a positive change when it comes to the overall behavior of your child.
Looking for more information on positive parenting?
More4kids is a resource for families and their children
Mr. Heath is a writer and the chief editor at More4kids.info, a website devoted to parenting and families. Copyright 2009 More4kids Inc.
Problems in Stopping the Back Talk
Every single day, there are adults everywhere who are at their ends wit when it comes to trying to stop kids from talking back. If you face this challenge, it is essential to know and understand that it is not appropriate to give into this type of behavior. It is considered to be highly disrespectful and disrespect should not be tolerated in children. If it is tolerated, the child will grow to develop many different types of emotional and behavioral problems. If you are having problem in stopping the back talk, it is important to evaluate your response to this behavior, as well as the responses of others. It is then that you can develop a plan to put a stop to this type of verbal disrespect.
Common Reasons for Talking Back
There are many different reasons why a child may talk back. The following list details some of the reasons why this may occur:
1. If a child is talking back, it is important to observe the behavior of the adults in the home. It is a known fact that many children model themselves after the adults that they come in contact with on a daily basis. Do the adults in the home exhibit a smartallic conversational tone? Do these individuals become loud and obnoxious? If this is occurring in the home, it is quite possible that the child is not the one to blame, but the adults in the home are. Appropriate behavior modification should be implemented in order to adjust to that which is acceptable.
2. If the parents and other adults around the child who is talking back often "gives in" to the behavior of the child, the kid will use this to their advantage. They will gain a certain level of control by back talking and being quite obnoxious about it. Children should grow to learn that "no" is no, and that they will not always get their way.
3. Many children who do not feel as if they get any attention from their parents may begin to talk back to adults in order to acquire attention - even if it is negative. To a child, negative attention is better than no attention at all.
How to Handle Back Talk
There are many ways that you can handle back talk if you are on the receiving end as an adult. The following details some of the methods that have been found to be effective in this type of situation:
1. If a child starts to back talk you, you should hold them accountable immediately and then follow up on this accountability by informing that their actions are unacceptable and will not be tolerated. Stop the behavior in its tracks and make sure they take you seriously when you do this. This means backing up what you say, when you say it.
2. Many children will talk back to an adult to simply get an argument going. If your child does this, you hold them accountable, and they continue to engage in the behavior, simply ignore them. When they see that their ability to control and manipulate you just is not working, then eventually the behavior will die out completely.
3. If your child back talks and you observe them being respectful in conversation later, you must ensure that you point this out and encourage them to act in this manner more often. Eventually, they will come to a point where they want to please you.
Conclusion
When kids talk back, it is a complicated experience. However, it is a behavior that can be modified. By understanding what causes it, and how you can correct it, you can easily bring about a positive change when it comes to the overall behavior of your child.
Looking for more information on positive parenting?
More4kids is a resource for families and their children
Mr. Heath is a writer and the chief editor at More4kids.info, a website devoted to parenting and families. Copyright 2009 More4kids Inc.
3 Ways Babies Can Teach Us How to Beat Fatigue
We've all experienced it at some point. Some days, exhaustion can feel like a way of life. Sometimes new parents have it the hardest. Middle of the night feedings disrupting your sleep, which interrupts a regular exercise routine, which compounds with an unpredictable diet. But for new parents and non-parents alike there are things we can all learn from the techniques of a baby's simple and natural way of living that will help us combat our own fatigue.
Here are 3 simple things you can do to easily beat fatigue:
1. Keep a Regular Schedule
Now of course I'm not suggesting you nap throughout the day like a baby, but with a consistent nightly sleeping schedule, your body's natural circadian rhythm is easily maintained. The circadian rhythm is a term that describes the natural sleep/wake/eating schedule that we all have and are supposed to follow. It's a complex system that is regulated by your exposure to light (or lack thereof) as well as a number of hormones, including melatonin and cortisol. These two hormones have a direct effect on core body temperature and blood sugar regulation, respectively.
The circadian rhythm is much like the sun which predictably rises and sets each day. Your body mimics this predictability to live effectively and efficiently. However, with our brilliant intellect and ingenuity, we've invented ways to live outside of this natural cycle. We have lights during darkness and food at our disposal any time of the day or night. Unfortunately, these wonderful conveniences make it easier to stray from a regular eating and sleeping pattern. Then, as a result of poor sleep and fluctuations to normal blood sugar levels the circadian rhythm is disrupted and fatigue begins to set in. Get at least 7-9 hours of sleep and do your best to go to bed at the same time every night. With this consistency, your body is able to maintain a normal circadian rhythm that will ultimately help you combat fatigue during waking hours.
2. The Most Important Meal
New babies can enjoy nature's perfect baby food: breast milk. Cleverly designed to contain the proper amounts of fats, carbohydrates and proteins in a great package which makes it available for easy feedings, breast milk provides all the nutrition babies need for at least the first six months of life. There is ample literature to suggest that feeding babies every 3-4 hours allows them to be more relaxed and easy going because they consciously know that food will be coming, plus their digestive systems will not be overtaxed with too frequent or too spread out of feedings.
Finding this proper nutritional balance for children and adults is also critical for good health. As with babies, you should eat smaller meals every 3-4 hours throughout the day to stabilize blood sugar and prevent tiredness.
And, when it comes to preventing fatigue during the day, breakfast truly is the most important meal. Our normal metabolic functions slow down throughout the night so we don't get hungry as we sleep. We wake each morning having not eaten anything for 8-12 hours, depending on what time we had dinner the night before. A healthy breakfast helps balance cortisol and therefore prevents you from a mid-morning energy crash from dropping blood sugar levels. A study published earlier this year demonstrated the cognitive benefit that test subjects had when they consumed at least a 450-calorie breakfast of both protein and fiber. Another group of scientists studied over 200 medical students and monitored their performance after skipping breakfast. Not surprisingly, those students who skipped breakfast had an overall increase in fatigue.
3. Belly Breathing
With the rhythmic movement of their little bellies and the innocent, gentle noises they make, there are few things in this world more peaceful than watching a baby sleep. Babies naturally take deep breaths that originate from their bellies, with both inhaling and exhaling taking on a slow and relaxed state. We average about 15,500 breaths a day and for every single one of them, we don't even have to think about it! It's a natural action. But unfortunately, as we move out of childhood and into adulthood, life gets busier and our breathing becomes more hurried and shallow, coming less from the muscles designed to facilitate breathing (i.e., the diaphragm) and causing an increase in accessory muscle tension. Because the lower third portion of your lungs has the most efficient oxygen exchange sites, this type of shallow breathing prevents you from getting all the necessary oxygen your body needs, causing fatigue.
It's important to get as much oxygen to those lower lungs as possible! A famous study done in the early 1980's demonstrated that adults who spent as little as 10 minutes a day focusing on their breathing had better energy and greater work performance. You can do that. Just take 10 minutes each day and focus on improving your belly breathing. Sit in a comfortable location, with your spine straight and shoulders back, breathe in deep through your nose for a count of seven seconds. Allow your belly to expand outwards as you inhale. Then hold your breath for a count of four seconds. Finally, exhale for a count of nine seconds, this time moving your belly inward. The exhale is a little longer than the inhale, which is done on purpose. When you move to the next inhale cycle, you'll notice some reflexive support from all the muscles that are necessary for proper belly breathing.
In summary:
*Get 7-9 hours of sleep and go to bed at the same time each night
*Eat a healthy breakfast of protein and fiber
*Spend 10 minutes a day belly breathing
Follow these simple steps, and you'll be as happy as a baby and smiling at the world with plenty of energy!
Would you like to use this article? You may as long as you include the following information along with the article: Phil Wazny, NMD is a naturopathic physician at Integrative Health Care, a "Results Based Natural Medicine" Clinic in Scottsdale, AZ. He created several dynamic programs designed to help patients gain strength while reducing their rate of debilitating conditions like cancer and heart disease. His areas of specialty are permanent weight loss, natural pediatrics, allergy solutions, hormone balancing and pain relief with prolotherapy and PRP therapy. He can be reached at http://www.integrativehealthcare.com and 480-657-0003.
Here are 3 simple things you can do to easily beat fatigue:
1. Keep a Regular Schedule
Now of course I'm not suggesting you nap throughout the day like a baby, but with a consistent nightly sleeping schedule, your body's natural circadian rhythm is easily maintained. The circadian rhythm is a term that describes the natural sleep/wake/eating schedule that we all have and are supposed to follow. It's a complex system that is regulated by your exposure to light (or lack thereof) as well as a number of hormones, including melatonin and cortisol. These two hormones have a direct effect on core body temperature and blood sugar regulation, respectively.
The circadian rhythm is much like the sun which predictably rises and sets each day. Your body mimics this predictability to live effectively and efficiently. However, with our brilliant intellect and ingenuity, we've invented ways to live outside of this natural cycle. We have lights during darkness and food at our disposal any time of the day or night. Unfortunately, these wonderful conveniences make it easier to stray from a regular eating and sleeping pattern. Then, as a result of poor sleep and fluctuations to normal blood sugar levels the circadian rhythm is disrupted and fatigue begins to set in. Get at least 7-9 hours of sleep and do your best to go to bed at the same time every night. With this consistency, your body is able to maintain a normal circadian rhythm that will ultimately help you combat fatigue during waking hours.
2. The Most Important Meal
New babies can enjoy nature's perfect baby food: breast milk. Cleverly designed to contain the proper amounts of fats, carbohydrates and proteins in a great package which makes it available for easy feedings, breast milk provides all the nutrition babies need for at least the first six months of life. There is ample literature to suggest that feeding babies every 3-4 hours allows them to be more relaxed and easy going because they consciously know that food will be coming, plus their digestive systems will not be overtaxed with too frequent or too spread out of feedings.
Finding this proper nutritional balance for children and adults is also critical for good health. As with babies, you should eat smaller meals every 3-4 hours throughout the day to stabilize blood sugar and prevent tiredness.
And, when it comes to preventing fatigue during the day, breakfast truly is the most important meal. Our normal metabolic functions slow down throughout the night so we don't get hungry as we sleep. We wake each morning having not eaten anything for 8-12 hours, depending on what time we had dinner the night before. A healthy breakfast helps balance cortisol and therefore prevents you from a mid-morning energy crash from dropping blood sugar levels. A study published earlier this year demonstrated the cognitive benefit that test subjects had when they consumed at least a 450-calorie breakfast of both protein and fiber. Another group of scientists studied over 200 medical students and monitored their performance after skipping breakfast. Not surprisingly, those students who skipped breakfast had an overall increase in fatigue.
3. Belly Breathing
With the rhythmic movement of their little bellies and the innocent, gentle noises they make, there are few things in this world more peaceful than watching a baby sleep. Babies naturally take deep breaths that originate from their bellies, with both inhaling and exhaling taking on a slow and relaxed state. We average about 15,500 breaths a day and for every single one of them, we don't even have to think about it! It's a natural action. But unfortunately, as we move out of childhood and into adulthood, life gets busier and our breathing becomes more hurried and shallow, coming less from the muscles designed to facilitate breathing (i.e., the diaphragm) and causing an increase in accessory muscle tension. Because the lower third portion of your lungs has the most efficient oxygen exchange sites, this type of shallow breathing prevents you from getting all the necessary oxygen your body needs, causing fatigue.
It's important to get as much oxygen to those lower lungs as possible! A famous study done in the early 1980's demonstrated that adults who spent as little as 10 minutes a day focusing on their breathing had better energy and greater work performance. You can do that. Just take 10 minutes each day and focus on improving your belly breathing. Sit in a comfortable location, with your spine straight and shoulders back, breathe in deep through your nose for a count of seven seconds. Allow your belly to expand outwards as you inhale. Then hold your breath for a count of four seconds. Finally, exhale for a count of nine seconds, this time moving your belly inward. The exhale is a little longer than the inhale, which is done on purpose. When you move to the next inhale cycle, you'll notice some reflexive support from all the muscles that are necessary for proper belly breathing.
In summary:
*Get 7-9 hours of sleep and go to bed at the same time each night
*Eat a healthy breakfast of protein and fiber
*Spend 10 minutes a day belly breathing
Follow these simple steps, and you'll be as happy as a baby and smiling at the world with plenty of energy!
Would you like to use this article? You may as long as you include the following information along with the article: Phil Wazny, NMD is a naturopathic physician at Integrative Health Care, a "Results Based Natural Medicine" Clinic in Scottsdale, AZ. He created several dynamic programs designed to help patients gain strength while reducing their rate of debilitating conditions like cancer and heart disease. His areas of specialty are permanent weight loss, natural pediatrics, allergy solutions, hormone balancing and pain relief with prolotherapy and PRP therapy. He can be reached at http://www.integrativehealthcare.com and 480-657-0003.
Blaming The Parents
It seems that nowadays that more and more people are blaming their parents for a bad childhood, and somehow that reasoning gives them a license to misbehave as adults.
Blaming your parents for your current behavior is irrational and irresponsible. One of the steps towards adulthood and self fulfillment is to understand that every person is responsible for their own actions. You are responsible for yourself.
Most people dutifully profess love towards their children and parents. The reality is that the love is only lip service to sooth the public consciousness. When in fact through many past and present irrationalities, conflicts, and demands there is no real love. Lack of respect for the others rights leads to loss of genuine love and enjoyment between parents and children. The lack of trust makes love impossible.
However with that said, we all must realize that an important step towards emotional growth is to acknowledge that no one has an actual duty to love another. Not even parents towards their children, or children towards their parents.
Genuine love occurs only voluntarily, through a mutual exchange of objectives and emotional values. Genuine love between parents and children can and does occur in those relationships in which objectives and values are exchanged and allowed to grow.
When there is no love between parents and children both are partially responsible for some problems experienced by certain adolescents and young adults. Major problems between parents and children are often the result of loss of trust and respect between them. Parents fail to treat children as human beings with individual rights. Parents often resort to force and physical violence under the euphemism of discipline, protection or control.
The cycle becomes sustaining, but can be corrected with effort. It all comes down to an act of defiance, followed by harsh discipline. What should happen is open communication to discover the cause of the defiance. Physical violence is proof of communication failure, and should be avoided.
Too often parents are blamed for their grown children’s faults and behavior. Once a person has reached the legal age they become irrevocably responsible for themselves. Blaming parents only hides or avoids self responsibility and the efforts needed to develop ones own self.
If children are never given respect, they never develop respect for their parents, for themselves or for values. Such children become the future problems as they do not value honesty with themselves or others. Always seeking to survive by usurping others, to get revenge for their upbringing while not taking responsibility for their own life.
The most valuable gift a parent can give to their children is the environment where they learn honesty, integrity, independence and the ability to use assertive effort to produce value for others. If your children are young enjoy them while you can, but respect them as fellow humans and they will grow to respect you and voluntarily love you.
If your children are grown and are still problems to them selves and society, tell them that you are not responsible for their actions, they are responsible for their actions. Give them a short explanation that they are independent human beings with individual rights and responsibilities. Tell them if you must that you apologize for their poor childhood, but the past is gone, all you have is now.
If you are an adult and you cannot talk to your parents, realize this; you are solely responsible for what you do and who you are. The past may have been less than desirable, but it is gone, over and done. You can be who you want to be!
So to sum up, treat each other as you would want to be treated, and the whole world becomes a better place.
Be Blessed
Written by Ralston Heath
Did You like what you saw? You can find more at: http://true-happiness.blogspot.com/
Blaming your parents for your current behavior is irrational and irresponsible. One of the steps towards adulthood and self fulfillment is to understand that every person is responsible for their own actions. You are responsible for yourself.
Most people dutifully profess love towards their children and parents. The reality is that the love is only lip service to sooth the public consciousness. When in fact through many past and present irrationalities, conflicts, and demands there is no real love. Lack of respect for the others rights leads to loss of genuine love and enjoyment between parents and children. The lack of trust makes love impossible.
However with that said, we all must realize that an important step towards emotional growth is to acknowledge that no one has an actual duty to love another. Not even parents towards their children, or children towards their parents.
Genuine love occurs only voluntarily, through a mutual exchange of objectives and emotional values. Genuine love between parents and children can and does occur in those relationships in which objectives and values are exchanged and allowed to grow.
When there is no love between parents and children both are partially responsible for some problems experienced by certain adolescents and young adults. Major problems between parents and children are often the result of loss of trust and respect between them. Parents fail to treat children as human beings with individual rights. Parents often resort to force and physical violence under the euphemism of discipline, protection or control.
The cycle becomes sustaining, but can be corrected with effort. It all comes down to an act of defiance, followed by harsh discipline. What should happen is open communication to discover the cause of the defiance. Physical violence is proof of communication failure, and should be avoided.
Too often parents are blamed for their grown children’s faults and behavior. Once a person has reached the legal age they become irrevocably responsible for themselves. Blaming parents only hides or avoids self responsibility and the efforts needed to develop ones own self.
If children are never given respect, they never develop respect for their parents, for themselves or for values. Such children become the future problems as they do not value honesty with themselves or others. Always seeking to survive by usurping others, to get revenge for their upbringing while not taking responsibility for their own life.
The most valuable gift a parent can give to their children is the environment where they learn honesty, integrity, independence and the ability to use assertive effort to produce value for others. If your children are young enjoy them while you can, but respect them as fellow humans and they will grow to respect you and voluntarily love you.
If your children are grown and are still problems to them selves and society, tell them that you are not responsible for their actions, they are responsible for their actions. Give them a short explanation that they are independent human beings with individual rights and responsibilities. Tell them if you must that you apologize for their poor childhood, but the past is gone, all you have is now.
If you are an adult and you cannot talk to your parents, realize this; you are solely responsible for what you do and who you are. The past may have been less than desirable, but it is gone, over and done. You can be who you want to be!
So to sum up, treat each other as you would want to be treated, and the whole world becomes a better place.
Be Blessed
Written by Ralston Heath
Did You like what you saw? You can find more at: http://true-happiness.blogspot.com/
The Trouble With Parents
Like most parents, my partner and I work hard to develop our children into healthy, well adjusted people. We want them to have the skills to persue whatever objectives they choose for themselves in this world.
None of us are perfect parents and we all learn from the past. The purpose of this article is to pass on one of our experiences. It had a profound effect on the way we approach the parenting game.
A few years ago, our two children were aged two and four. Over a period of weeks one of our boys had become increasingly naughty. His behaviour was rubbing off on his brother. Mum and dad had explored the usual discipline options but nothing seemed to work.
Eventually, as my partner and I discussed the boys behaviour, we decided that there must be a trigger. If we could find it, we thought we could perhaps effect a change for the better.
We wound back the clock to the time when the behaviour change emerged, then looked at what we had all been doing at around that time.
As it turned out, the onset corresponded with a time when my job was being restructured and my partner was as worried as I about the outcome. We were both focussed on ourselves and quite naturally were exhibiting signs of stress.
The result of this pressure, was that we had very little time for our children and they were not getting the attention they needed from us.
We decided to try an experiment. We set aside all our other priorities for the weekend and spend time with boys. Nothing special, just being with them and giving them quality time.
Their behaviours changed almost instantly. And it was a change for the better.
This small experience had a profound effect on the way we approach parenting. We learned that the behaviours of our children are significantly affected by our own behaviours.
We are now a lot more careful about the amount of time we spend with our boys. When there is a behavioural change from them, we look to ourselves first then check the external influences before we choose a course of action.
Parenting is a wonderful journey, full of twists turns and surprises. I hope that by sharing this small part of our life it will help you in yours.
Brian Pratt is a 47 year old New Zealander. He owns a Plug-In Profit Site at http://www.bestrealincome.com. If you are looking for a home business be sure to check out his site. You can contact Brian at brian@bestrealincome.com
None of us are perfect parents and we all learn from the past. The purpose of this article is to pass on one of our experiences. It had a profound effect on the way we approach the parenting game.
A few years ago, our two children were aged two and four. Over a period of weeks one of our boys had become increasingly naughty. His behaviour was rubbing off on his brother. Mum and dad had explored the usual discipline options but nothing seemed to work.
Eventually, as my partner and I discussed the boys behaviour, we decided that there must be a trigger. If we could find it, we thought we could perhaps effect a change for the better.
We wound back the clock to the time when the behaviour change emerged, then looked at what we had all been doing at around that time.
As it turned out, the onset corresponded with a time when my job was being restructured and my partner was as worried as I about the outcome. We were both focussed on ourselves and quite naturally were exhibiting signs of stress.
The result of this pressure, was that we had very little time for our children and they were not getting the attention they needed from us.
We decided to try an experiment. We set aside all our other priorities for the weekend and spend time with boys. Nothing special, just being with them and giving them quality time.
Their behaviours changed almost instantly. And it was a change for the better.
This small experience had a profound effect on the way we approach parenting. We learned that the behaviours of our children are significantly affected by our own behaviours.
We are now a lot more careful about the amount of time we spend with our boys. When there is a behavioural change from them, we look to ourselves first then check the external influences before we choose a course of action.
Parenting is a wonderful journey, full of twists turns and surprises. I hope that by sharing this small part of our life it will help you in yours.
Brian Pratt is a 47 year old New Zealander. He owns a Plug-In Profit Site at http://www.bestrealincome.com. If you are looking for a home business be sure to check out his site. You can contact Brian at brian@bestrealincome.com
Children’s Summer Camps - Frequently Asked Questions
Summer camp programs can be a wonderful experience for all children if you chose the right camp for them. If you follow certain guidelines, you can help your child have the best experience possible. These steps involve ‘choosing the right type of camp’, checking out the ‘facilities and staff’, and preparing your child for the upcoming children’s summer camp.
The idea of a youth summer camp can induce strong emotions on the part of parents and children. These sensations run the gamut from ‘excitement and fun’ to ‘fear and anxiety’. In many social circles it is a status symbol or a family tradition. The correct reason for providing the camp experience is if it is ‘in the best interest of the child’.
Deciding to camp or not to camp—How does a parent determine what is ‘in the best interest of the child?’ Some questions parents should ask themselves are: -
Are the summer camp activities being used to solve a childcare problem?
Is this an opportunity for my child to learn, grow and experience life in a unique way?
Is my child a risk taker?
Does my child enjoy new experiences even before I am ready to provide them?
Has my child enjoyed overnight experiences with family or friends?
Does my child have friends who attend camp?
Will camp provide prospects for my child to enjoy ‘favorite activities’?
What will be the expenditure for a moderate or super ‘kids summer camp’? Can I bear the burden?
If you answered ‘yes’ to questions two through eight you have it made. If you answered ‘yes’ to question one only, the odds of success are slim. If you answered ‘yes’ to at least four of questions two through eight, the odds are optimal for a successful traditional summer camp experience.
Selecting the right camp to support the interests of your child should be your main aim. Your child wants to camp, but you may have concerns. Be careful not to convey your concerns.
We offer the leading summer camp program source. Check it out only on the youth summer camps planet. All about summer camps on http://www.leandernet.com
The idea of a youth summer camp can induce strong emotions on the part of parents and children. These sensations run the gamut from ‘excitement and fun’ to ‘fear and anxiety’. In many social circles it is a status symbol or a family tradition. The correct reason for providing the camp experience is if it is ‘in the best interest of the child’.
Deciding to camp or not to camp—How does a parent determine what is ‘in the best interest of the child?’ Some questions parents should ask themselves are: -
Are the summer camp activities being used to solve a childcare problem?
Is this an opportunity for my child to learn, grow and experience life in a unique way?
Is my child a risk taker?
Does my child enjoy new experiences even before I am ready to provide them?
Has my child enjoyed overnight experiences with family or friends?
Does my child have friends who attend camp?
Will camp provide prospects for my child to enjoy ‘favorite activities’?
What will be the expenditure for a moderate or super ‘kids summer camp’? Can I bear the burden?
If you answered ‘yes’ to questions two through eight you have it made. If you answered ‘yes’ to question one only, the odds of success are slim. If you answered ‘yes’ to at least four of questions two through eight, the odds are optimal for a successful traditional summer camp experience.
Selecting the right camp to support the interests of your child should be your main aim. Your child wants to camp, but you may have concerns. Be careful not to convey your concerns.
We offer the leading summer camp program source. Check it out only on the youth summer camps planet. All about summer camps on http://www.leandernet.com
Be A Parent Not A Friend
One parenting problem that is very prevalent today is the confusion between fulfilling the role of a parent and the role of a friend. It is natural to want to give you children everything, but never saying no can lead to seriously spoiled children who will not understand the ways of the world when they are out on their own.
It is your job as a parent to teach your children the facts of life—good or bad—so that they can make their own good decisions in the real world. It is simply not fair to expect children to be able to make decisions that negatively affect their lives when they are not prepared to make those decisions. You have a pretty good idea of what is best for your children, and certainly a better idea than they do. It is your responsibility as the adult to pass the love and knowledge you have experienced in your own life to your children to give them the best opportunity to lead a successful life.
The principles you instill at a young age will follow your children throughout life. When they are little you make them brush their teeth, eat their vegetables and clean their rooms, not only because you know that these things are good for them, but also because you want them to one day learn to do them without being told. There are many times in life when we have to do things we do not want to do, and by not sugarcoating this idea when your children are young, they will be more accepting of it as they grow and mature into adults.
Never saying no doesn’t build friendship with your children. It may content them in the moment, but in the long run it will only make them selfish and rude. Never using the word no gives your child a handicap that will make it harder for him or her to succeed in life. No one will want to befriend, date, hire or live with a selfish person.
Playing the role of disciplinarian may not seem like a way to bond with your children, but once they grow past the stage when you are responsible for making their decisions, friendship can grow. They will respect you for making the good decisions for them that they were not able to make on their own. Let their peers be their friends. Their peers certainly are not going to act as parents, so this all-important chore is left to you.
Parenting is a grand struggle between giving to your child and instituting discipline. The balance will be different for everyone, but it is important to keep reevaluating what needs to be done and take steps to reestablish and maintain that balance.
About the Author
Solomon Brenner is an Author, speaker and columnist on success and parenting he can be reached at Actionkarate@comcast.net or 267-939-0424
It is your job as a parent to teach your children the facts of life—good or bad—so that they can make their own good decisions in the real world. It is simply not fair to expect children to be able to make decisions that negatively affect their lives when they are not prepared to make those decisions. You have a pretty good idea of what is best for your children, and certainly a better idea than they do. It is your responsibility as the adult to pass the love and knowledge you have experienced in your own life to your children to give them the best opportunity to lead a successful life.
The principles you instill at a young age will follow your children throughout life. When they are little you make them brush their teeth, eat their vegetables and clean their rooms, not only because you know that these things are good for them, but also because you want them to one day learn to do them without being told. There are many times in life when we have to do things we do not want to do, and by not sugarcoating this idea when your children are young, they will be more accepting of it as they grow and mature into adults.
Never saying no doesn’t build friendship with your children. It may content them in the moment, but in the long run it will only make them selfish and rude. Never using the word no gives your child a handicap that will make it harder for him or her to succeed in life. No one will want to befriend, date, hire or live with a selfish person.
Playing the role of disciplinarian may not seem like a way to bond with your children, but once they grow past the stage when you are responsible for making their decisions, friendship can grow. They will respect you for making the good decisions for them that they were not able to make on their own. Let their peers be their friends. Their peers certainly are not going to act as parents, so this all-important chore is left to you.
Parenting is a grand struggle between giving to your child and instituting discipline. The balance will be different for everyone, but it is important to keep reevaluating what needs to be done and take steps to reestablish and maintain that balance.
About the Author
Solomon Brenner is an Author, speaker and columnist on success and parenting he can be reached at Actionkarate@comcast.net or 267-939-0424
Where to Look for the Perfect Parenting Resource
All parents need a good parenting resource of their own. Since parenting is such a tough occupation a parenting resource can help make things easier for any parent. How and where can a parent find a relevant parenting resource? There is no one sure and perfect parenting resource for everyone. A parent may have to determine for himself/herself which parenting resource is helpful and applicable. There are however specific areas where one can get a parenting resource. You can get your parenting resource from the following:
The Book and Video Haven
Any place where they sell or lend a vast selection of books and videos may be a parenting resource. You can go around looking for a bestseller parenting resource or something created by experts in the field of parenting and psychology to get a good parenting resource. Surprisingly, an experiential parenting resource account or even fictional stories of parenting may be useful parenting resource for the discriminating parent.
Comprehensive Sites and Links
Not surprisingly, the internet can have every kind of parenting resource imaginable. You have the option of checking out sites that will provide you with a comprehensive parenting resource section or one that will provide you with specific parenting resource information. You can also check link or .net sites if you want to have a brief overview of some other sites that may be good places for a parenting resource.
Message Boards and Others
You may prefer a parenting resource that’s highly practical and that comes from people who have actually experienced parenting. You can use parents’ forums and message boards as your parenting resource. In this kind of parenting resource you can swap stories and practical tips and information. A lot of parents may warm up to this kind of parenting resource because it is conversational, light and a fun way to go about talking about parenting.
Formal Classes and Support Groups
A clear and structured parenting resource may come from such formal areas as parenting courses and support groups. This type of
parenting resource will surely offer highly professional pieces of information. There is no doubt that if you enroll in a parenting resource class, you will get a load of theories and actual practice accounts from trained professionals in the field of parenting. Support groups can also offer parenting resource that may be both categorized as formal expert quality and personally supportive and uplifting in nature.
People You Know
A practical parenting resource source would be people you actually know. Your own parents, family, friends and colleagues may each be a parenting resource. Ask these live, actual parenting resource people what they can share based on what they know and their experience. This may be the cheapest and best parenting resource you can ever have.
However and wherever you choose to get your parenting resource make sure that your parenting resource is applicable to you and your family. Remember, not all families are the same.
Veronica Fisher
The Book and Video Haven
Any place where they sell or lend a vast selection of books and videos may be a parenting resource. You can go around looking for a bestseller parenting resource or something created by experts in the field of parenting and psychology to get a good parenting resource. Surprisingly, an experiential parenting resource account or even fictional stories of parenting may be useful parenting resource for the discriminating parent.
Comprehensive Sites and Links
Not surprisingly, the internet can have every kind of parenting resource imaginable. You have the option of checking out sites that will provide you with a comprehensive parenting resource section or one that will provide you with specific parenting resource information. You can also check link or .net sites if you want to have a brief overview of some other sites that may be good places for a parenting resource.
Message Boards and Others
You may prefer a parenting resource that’s highly practical and that comes from people who have actually experienced parenting. You can use parents’ forums and message boards as your parenting resource. In this kind of parenting resource you can swap stories and practical tips and information. A lot of parents may warm up to this kind of parenting resource because it is conversational, light and a fun way to go about talking about parenting.
Formal Classes and Support Groups
A clear and structured parenting resource may come from such formal areas as parenting courses and support groups. This type of
parenting resource will surely offer highly professional pieces of information. There is no doubt that if you enroll in a parenting resource class, you will get a load of theories and actual practice accounts from trained professionals in the field of parenting. Support groups can also offer parenting resource that may be both categorized as formal expert quality and personally supportive and uplifting in nature.
People You Know
A practical parenting resource source would be people you actually know. Your own parents, family, friends and colleagues may each be a parenting resource. Ask these live, actual parenting resource people what they can share based on what they know and their experience. This may be the cheapest and best parenting resource you can ever have.
However and wherever you choose to get your parenting resource make sure that your parenting resource is applicable to you and your family. Remember, not all families are the same.
Veronica Fisher
You Aren't Alone: Ten Things Every Parent Experiences When It Comes to Their Children
Don't let those "been there done that" parental types throw you off! They may have forgotten what it was like when they had children, so they would love to make you think that "I never had the problem..." but the truth is they did have that problem, it's just that they were so angry when it happened they lost their minds! So here is a list of ten things that any parent who is honest will admit, "Yes, we had the same problem!" If they didn't have it during their child's toddler years they had to deal with it during the tween or teen years! Take a look...
1. Temper Tantrums when you take something away. Temper Tantrums because they wanted to go somewhere else other than back at home again. Temper Tantrums because they don't like what you cooked. Temper Tantrums because they need a nap!
2. Talking back. Whether loud so you can hear or under their breath, it's all the same thing!
3. Lying. Whether a little one or a big one, they all lie about something.
4. Tattle-telling. He say she say and he did and she did, but never the complete story on what "I did..."
5. Incomplete or inaccurate story-telling. They tell a story in such a way to your partner so that he or she becomes furious with you or so that you won't become angry at them.
6. Broken toys, broken dishware, broken picture frames, broken whatever...sh*t happens!
7. Lost things. "I don't know where my toy is mommy? I don't know what I did with my..." They will forget where they last left something.
8. Everything that they shouldn't hear or say they want to say or hear it!
9. They love everyone but you, because you are the enforcer! They love you when you do everything for them! "Your the greatest...I love you!"
10. There will come a time that you will either think about spanking them or actually do it! Don't beat yourself up about it!
1. Temper Tantrums when you take something away. Temper Tantrums because they wanted to go somewhere else other than back at home again. Temper Tantrums because they don't like what you cooked. Temper Tantrums because they need a nap!
2. Talking back. Whether loud so you can hear or under their breath, it's all the same thing!
3. Lying. Whether a little one or a big one, they all lie about something.
4. Tattle-telling. He say she say and he did and she did, but never the complete story on what "I did..."
5. Incomplete or inaccurate story-telling. They tell a story in such a way to your partner so that he or she becomes furious with you or so that you won't become angry at them.
6. Broken toys, broken dishware, broken picture frames, broken whatever...sh*t happens!
7. Lost things. "I don't know where my toy is mommy? I don't know what I did with my..." They will forget where they last left something.
8. Everything that they shouldn't hear or say they want to say or hear it!
9. They love everyone but you, because you are the enforcer! They love you when you do everything for them! "Your the greatest...I love you!"
10. There will come a time that you will either think about spanking them or actually do it! Don't beat yourself up about it!
You Don't Need a "Supernanny" to Be an Active Parent
The hot new reality TV show "Nanny 911" has been joined by a similar nanny-to-the-rescue show called "Supernanny." These shows depict families in which the children are extremely out of control, rebellious, spoiled or otherwise quite a handful. The nannies come in for a week (from sunrise to bedtime each day), helping the family get back on track by teaching the parents effective parenting skills and modeling these skills firsthand with the children.
I have to admit to having only seen one episode of "Nanny 911," but, speaking as a parenting educator, I was impressed. The nanny sent to the rescue knew her stuff. She taught the parents to set limits, how to discipline using logical consequences and how to be firm and calm at the same time. She was good enough--and here's a huge compliment coming--to have been an Active Parenting leader. In fact, at one point, as the passive father is learning to be more involved, these words appear on the screen: "Father is becoming a more active parent."
Although I'm not a big reality TV fan in general, I think these two particular shows can be of real value to a lot of parents. They provide useful information and teach good parenting skills. Let's face it--if it works with these dysfunctional families, these skills will probably work for you, too!
And here's the good news: you don't have to be on a reality show to learn effective parenting skills. Parenting classes are available all over the country. You can watch the videos, consult with a parent educator, and share ideas with other parents just like you. To find one in your community, check with your child's school guidance counselor. Many classes are also listed on our web site.
But however you decide to improve your family life, please keep making the effort. Parenting is not the only influence on a child's life...but it's the one you can do the most about.
Author: Michael H. Popkin, Ph.D.
Dr. Popkin is a former child and family therapist in Atlanta. He founded Active Parenting Publishers in 1983 to help parents raise responsible children who are able to face life's challenges. His free, online "What's Your Parenting Style?" quiz is a popular way for parents to spot the strengths and weaknesses of their style. http://www.activeparenting.com/parents.htm
I have to admit to having only seen one episode of "Nanny 911," but, speaking as a parenting educator, I was impressed. The nanny sent to the rescue knew her stuff. She taught the parents to set limits, how to discipline using logical consequences and how to be firm and calm at the same time. She was good enough--and here's a huge compliment coming--to have been an Active Parenting leader. In fact, at one point, as the passive father is learning to be more involved, these words appear on the screen: "Father is becoming a more active parent."
Although I'm not a big reality TV fan in general, I think these two particular shows can be of real value to a lot of parents. They provide useful information and teach good parenting skills. Let's face it--if it works with these dysfunctional families, these skills will probably work for you, too!
And here's the good news: you don't have to be on a reality show to learn effective parenting skills. Parenting classes are available all over the country. You can watch the videos, consult with a parent educator, and share ideas with other parents just like you. To find one in your community, check with your child's school guidance counselor. Many classes are also listed on our web site.
But however you decide to improve your family life, please keep making the effort. Parenting is not the only influence on a child's life...but it's the one you can do the most about.
Author: Michael H. Popkin, Ph.D.
Dr. Popkin is a former child and family therapist in Atlanta. He founded Active Parenting Publishers in 1983 to help parents raise responsible children who are able to face life's challenges. His free, online "What's Your Parenting Style?" quiz is a popular way for parents to spot the strengths and weaknesses of their style. http://www.activeparenting.com/parents.htm
Tips Of Positive Parenting Skills - Parenting Guidelines For Single Mothers
Raising children as a single mother is a challenge. There are moments when you find that your life is in complete disarray and your house is in complete chaos. This is the time when you feel that you lack essential parenting tips as a single mother. It is better to have such arsenal at your disposal before you land in such a situation.
There are numerous ways to deal with various age groups. Confronting strategies for toddlers differ with those for teenagers. Your 16 year old boy is likely to make fun of you if he is told to spend some time in a thinking chair as he is being obstinate, stubborn and aggressive. On the other hand a few minutes time out will do wonders while tackling a 4 year old. So to be successful as a single mother you should have a set of parenting tips for each group.
Material regarding good parenting skills is widely available. A number of genuine and self proclaimed specialists are also around. A list of websites, books and other means in this aspect would probably require paragraphs. To make your life easy I would mention a few here. You can start with a library or a book shop. Single moms bringing up toddlers and smaller children will really benefit from the Parents Magazine. Unfortunately the major content in Parents Magazine is aimed at married parents. Among the various books available, you should go through at least a couple of them. Those who like Dr. Fan will recommend you his books. Dr. Terry Brazelton is an authority on child behavior. He is a father as well as a pediatrician. Even though a number of his books may be out of date, the attitude of babies and other children has remained the same since long. Last of all "The Well Trained Mind" is a good choice for those who want to train their children early.
A number of websites and organizations are available to assist single mothers with parenting tips. A renowned group is Parents without partners. They provide a wide range of information for single mothers. In the UK similar information is available on gingerbread. Early Start and Head Start Programs deliver the same services in the USA. You may not be eligible for their preschool assistance, but you can participate in courses and seminars which they conduct on positive parenting. Last of all you can look for topics like single parenting and single mothers through any search engine on the internet and get the required information. So if you are a single mother in search of parenting tips now you know where and how to get the required information.
If you require some parenting tips just now I can give you a few basics. As an adult you should be in control. Keep yourself composed all the time. This may not be easy, particularly when you find green finger paint all over your kitchen. The moment you become angry and irritable, you lose your composure. Such a situation may make your little child scared. To be successful always be composed and exercise control over your voice and actions.
Discover ways to get help from single parenting support group and resource on single mother support when you visit http://www.singleparentingfordummy.com, the online single parenting support resources for dummy
There are numerous ways to deal with various age groups. Confronting strategies for toddlers differ with those for teenagers. Your 16 year old boy is likely to make fun of you if he is told to spend some time in a thinking chair as he is being obstinate, stubborn and aggressive. On the other hand a few minutes time out will do wonders while tackling a 4 year old. So to be successful as a single mother you should have a set of parenting tips for each group.
Material regarding good parenting skills is widely available. A number of genuine and self proclaimed specialists are also around. A list of websites, books and other means in this aspect would probably require paragraphs. To make your life easy I would mention a few here. You can start with a library or a book shop. Single moms bringing up toddlers and smaller children will really benefit from the Parents Magazine. Unfortunately the major content in Parents Magazine is aimed at married parents. Among the various books available, you should go through at least a couple of them. Those who like Dr. Fan will recommend you his books. Dr. Terry Brazelton is an authority on child behavior. He is a father as well as a pediatrician. Even though a number of his books may be out of date, the attitude of babies and other children has remained the same since long. Last of all "The Well Trained Mind" is a good choice for those who want to train their children early.
A number of websites and organizations are available to assist single mothers with parenting tips. A renowned group is Parents without partners. They provide a wide range of information for single mothers. In the UK similar information is available on gingerbread. Early Start and Head Start Programs deliver the same services in the USA. You may not be eligible for their preschool assistance, but you can participate in courses and seminars which they conduct on positive parenting. Last of all you can look for topics like single parenting and single mothers through any search engine on the internet and get the required information. So if you are a single mother in search of parenting tips now you know where and how to get the required information.
If you require some parenting tips just now I can give you a few basics. As an adult you should be in control. Keep yourself composed all the time. This may not be easy, particularly when you find green finger paint all over your kitchen. The moment you become angry and irritable, you lose your composure. Such a situation may make your little child scared. To be successful always be composed and exercise control over your voice and actions.
Discover ways to get help from single parenting support group and resource on single mother support when you visit http://www.singleparentingfordummy.com, the online single parenting support resources for dummy
Birth Certificates, Wills & Insurance Documents
Oftentimes parents fail to think about the future, they believe that they will stay in one location most of their children's lives, but as we all know relationships grow sour, unemployment occurs, death and many other life tragedies, so what happens to all of your keepsakes in the process? They are usually thrown away, misplaced, destroyed, etc. However, one company decided to make it easy for everyone to find their documents and most of all keep them in a safe place--online! Don't put this off, consider getting all your documents together and storing them online. For more information, just click the following banner 
Pasadena Mothers' Support Group Holds Open House
he Pasadena Chapter of Mothers & More will hold its annual Open House on Thursday, October 16 from 7:30-9:30 p.m. in the Conference Room (North/ West area of the Parking Lot Level 1) of the Whole Foods Market, 465 South Arroyo Parkway, Pasadena, CA 91105.
The Open House will introduce women to the many services Mothers & More provides. Some of which are: resources designed to raise awareness on societal barriers that hinder a mother's ability to succeed, leadership opportunities, on line forums, and other information. All prospective members may attend with no obligation to join. The event will be held without children and will feature refreshments from Whole Foods Market, door prize giveaways from Dream Dinners and others.
The Pasadena chapter offers two evening meetings a month with topical discussions and/or guest speakers, in addition to moms' nights out, playgroups, book club, opportunities to reach out to other mothers, and other social events and activities. Mothers & More offers a place where mothers can talk honestly about the ups and downs of motherhood and receive the support, friendship and affirmation of their many roles as a mother, a woman, and a unique person.
Serving over 6000 members in the US and beyond, Mothers and More is a non-profit organization dedicated to improving the lives of mothers through support, education, and advocacy. It addresses mothers' needs as individuals and members of society, and promotes the value of all the work mothers do. For more information or to join on line, log onto www.mothersandmore.org.
To learn about the Pasadena chapter of Mothers & More, log on to the chapter website at http://mandmpas.tripod.com or call (866) 206-9068 #3921
The Open House will introduce women to the many services Mothers & More provides. Some of which are: resources designed to raise awareness on societal barriers that hinder a mother's ability to succeed, leadership opportunities, on line forums, and other information. All prospective members may attend with no obligation to join. The event will be held without children and will feature refreshments from Whole Foods Market, door prize giveaways from Dream Dinners and others.
The Pasadena chapter offers two evening meetings a month with topical discussions and/or guest speakers, in addition to moms' nights out, playgroups, book club, opportunities to reach out to other mothers, and other social events and activities. Mothers & More offers a place where mothers can talk honestly about the ups and downs of motherhood and receive the support, friendship and affirmation of their many roles as a mother, a woman, and a unique person.
Serving over 6000 members in the US and beyond, Mothers and More is a non-profit organization dedicated to improving the lives of mothers through support, education, and advocacy. It addresses mothers' needs as individuals and members of society, and promotes the value of all the work mothers do. For more information or to join on line, log onto www.mothersandmore.org.
To learn about the Pasadena chapter of Mothers & More, log on to the chapter website at http://mandmpas.tripod.com or call (866) 206-9068 #3921
Looking for helpful, inexpensive books on parenting?
Not much time or money, but you need an easy to read guide on parenting. No problem. The following reference materials were picked because of the practical advice they provide, the ease at which you can begin using the advice, and their inexpensive prices.
How much longer will you tolerate
the dishonesty and disrespect?
How many more temper tantrums
and arguments will you endure?
Have you wasted a lot of time and energy
trying to make your child change?
If so, then this might be the most important
letter you'll ever read:
Click Here!
"Finally! You Can Stop Lecturing, Scolding, Pushing And Prodding And Start Getting The Results You Want . . . Once You Learn This Long Forgotten Secret! What secret? I'll tell you in a few moments.Click Here!
In just 35 minutes, you'll have 22 techniques proven to get your baby to sleep soundly through the night. Simply download the Baby Sleep Solution audio program and turn that dream into a reality...guaranteed!Click Here!
How much longer will you tolerate
the dishonesty and disrespect?
How many more temper tantrums
and arguments will you endure?
Have you wasted a lot of time and energy
trying to make your child change?
If so, then this might be the most important
letter you'll ever read:
Click Here!
"Finally! You Can Stop Lecturing, Scolding, Pushing And Prodding And Start Getting The Results You Want . . . Once You Learn This Long Forgotten Secret! What secret? I'll tell you in a few moments.Click Here!
In just 35 minutes, you'll have 22 techniques proven to get your baby to sleep soundly through the night. Simply download the Baby Sleep Solution audio program and turn that dream into a reality...guaranteed!Click Here!
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