Must-Haves for Babies
I don't want my readers to miss this, especially if you or someone you know is pregnant. Visit my Squidoo page on this topic. When I had my baby, I was so happy to have these goodies for him. Must-Haves for Babies.
OMG! 35 Plus Having Another Baby? It's Not the End of the World or Is it?
If you haven't noticed by now, this blog is dedicated to those households that have a baby, a toddler, a tween, and a teen all living under one roof! I have four boys that were at one time in all of these groups (well a few still are.) Anyway, I am considered old in my "hood" for having such young children. Most of my friends have teens and adult sons and daughters.
Now some people will comment when you are an older mom or dad in such a situation as mine, "They could be your grandchildren...I know you were surprised when you found out you were pregnant...I don't know what I would have done...So you started late in life, huh? I'm glad mine are grown!" Enough already! I think. Does this sound like encouraging words to you?
I didn't anticipate being a mom in my twenties or thirties and I share my experiences in my book, When Mothers Cry.
There are those critics who act as if they are paying for your children when you have more than two. Don't walk down the street without the children's father pushing a stroller, there goes the looks from folks riding in cars or walking pass you and your family. Some smile, but some frown especially those who come from cultures that don't permit more than one child per family.
I have learned to recognize "the look" and I don't say anything, I just look straight ahead. My son noticed "the look" many times and asked me, "Why do people look at us so mean sometimes?"
It hurts when you or your family have done nothing wrong except exist and all a mean-spirited person can do is send out negative vibes! My oldest son is very perceptive. I talk to him about such people, and I tell him, "Don't be concerned, these people don't know you. We are going to have a good day. Besides, that man or woman is probably having a bad day." Sure, yeah right, one day we will revisit that topic except the next time we will talk about how some people have problems with one's skin color, but I digress. I do say to myself while making eye contact with some of these grumpy people, was the eye roll really necessary from a stranger or the mumble under one's breath, "...she got so many kids, all boys whew!?" The other day, someone asked me were two of my sons mine, then commented how we look alike, go figure!? Anyway...
So as I approach that age when the start of menopause begins, when the toddler becomes an elementary student, when the elementary student becomes a tween, and when the teen becomes a man, I will reassure myself, that the world isn't looking at me, they are just having a hard day.
Nicholl McGuire is the author of When Mothers Cry, Amazon.com
Now some people will comment when you are an older mom or dad in such a situation as mine, "They could be your grandchildren...I know you were surprised when you found out you were pregnant...I don't know what I would have done...So you started late in life, huh? I'm glad mine are grown!" Enough already! I think. Does this sound like encouraging words to you?
I didn't anticipate being a mom in my twenties or thirties and I share my experiences in my book, When Mothers Cry.
There are those critics who act as if they are paying for your children when you have more than two. Don't walk down the street without the children's father pushing a stroller, there goes the looks from folks riding in cars or walking pass you and your family. Some smile, but some frown especially those who come from cultures that don't permit more than one child per family.
I have learned to recognize "the look" and I don't say anything, I just look straight ahead. My son noticed "the look" many times and asked me, "Why do people look at us so mean sometimes?"
It hurts when you or your family have done nothing wrong except exist and all a mean-spirited person can do is send out negative vibes! My oldest son is very perceptive. I talk to him about such people, and I tell him, "Don't be concerned, these people don't know you. We are going to have a good day. Besides, that man or woman is probably having a bad day." Sure, yeah right, one day we will revisit that topic except the next time we will talk about how some people have problems with one's skin color, but I digress. I do say to myself while making eye contact with some of these grumpy people, was the eye roll really necessary from a stranger or the mumble under one's breath, "...she got so many kids, all boys whew!?" The other day, someone asked me were two of my sons mine, then commented how we look alike, go figure!? Anyway...
So as I approach that age when the start of menopause begins, when the toddler becomes an elementary student, when the elementary student becomes a tween, and when the teen becomes a man, I will reassure myself, that the world isn't looking at me, they are just having a hard day.
Nicholl McGuire is the author of When Mothers Cry, Amazon.com
6 Tips on Being Safe When Walking at Night
If you have older children, you may want to take the time to remind them about the following especially with summer fast-approaching...
Sometimes the dark night quickly falls upon us while visiting relatives or a neighbor. We may have walked over to his or her home and now we are left walking in the night. We have a choice to remain positive and brave or negative and scared while allowing everything we have heard in the media to permeate our ears. With a cautious mindset and positive outlook about walking alone at night, one should be less fearful about a possible attack.
One. Don't ignore your gut feelings.
Every human is built with “that feeling.” You know the one that tends to go in overdrive when you are about to make a decision that you shouldn't. It is an annoying, uncomfortable, and sometimes scary feeling. You ought to listen to it if you experience it before walking alone at night. Stay where you are until the feeling passes, then set out on your trip.
Two. Prepare for your walk.
You can do this by carrying keys in your hand between your fingers, a heavy duty flashlight, pepper spray or anything else that makes you feel somewhat at ease. All of these things can be used to fight off an attacker. If you don't have any of these things, then while walking pick up a stick, large stone or something else that is somewhat heavy and carry it with you.
Three. Watch and listen for any peculiar noises.
Moving shadows, strange noises behind bushes, dark vehicles and houses, and tall objects should all be noticed when walking. Distance yourself from the area in question if you feel an individual or animal is behaving strangely. Don't go to the noise to investigate. Sometimes criminals use noises and what seems to be harmless things to lure people such as leaving a baby unattended, asking for help to solve a problem, and faking an injury which leads us to the next point.
Four. Don't stop to talk to strangers.
Unless a person is warning you of pending danger, there is no reason why a stranger should come up to you in the dark and converse with you. Immediately you should think, “This person doesn't know me, what does he/she want?” Pick up your pace and carry on any conversation while walking, never bothering to stop. This way the person will more likely leave you alone.
Five. Avoid the temptation to run from four-legged animals.
A human can't out-run a healthy, active four-legged animal; therefore, it is better to stand still if you have nothing to fight off an attack. Allow the animal to sniff you, but avoid making eye contact.
Six. Keep out of alley ways.
Although this is common sense, plenty of people walk in areas out of public view because they are short-cuts that lead to home. They are also a good place for criminals to hang-out for victims passing through with wallets and purses too.
You can stay safe when walking alone at night if you think through your path getting to your destination in advance. Don't set out walking if you have no idea where you are going. Whenever you can, do walk with someone. Try not to walk when you are intoxicated, because this will make you an easy target for a criminal to take advantage of you.
By Nicholl McGuire
Sometimes the dark night quickly falls upon us while visiting relatives or a neighbor. We may have walked over to his or her home and now we are left walking in the night. We have a choice to remain positive and brave or negative and scared while allowing everything we have heard in the media to permeate our ears. With a cautious mindset and positive outlook about walking alone at night, one should be less fearful about a possible attack.
One. Don't ignore your gut feelings.
Every human is built with “that feeling.” You know the one that tends to go in overdrive when you are about to make a decision that you shouldn't. It is an annoying, uncomfortable, and sometimes scary feeling. You ought to listen to it if you experience it before walking alone at night. Stay where you are until the feeling passes, then set out on your trip.
Two. Prepare for your walk.
You can do this by carrying keys in your hand between your fingers, a heavy duty flashlight, pepper spray or anything else that makes you feel somewhat at ease. All of these things can be used to fight off an attacker. If you don't have any of these things, then while walking pick up a stick, large stone or something else that is somewhat heavy and carry it with you.
Three. Watch and listen for any peculiar noises.
Moving shadows, strange noises behind bushes, dark vehicles and houses, and tall objects should all be noticed when walking. Distance yourself from the area in question if you feel an individual or animal is behaving strangely. Don't go to the noise to investigate. Sometimes criminals use noises and what seems to be harmless things to lure people such as leaving a baby unattended, asking for help to solve a problem, and faking an injury which leads us to the next point.
Four. Don't stop to talk to strangers.
Unless a person is warning you of pending danger, there is no reason why a stranger should come up to you in the dark and converse with you. Immediately you should think, “This person doesn't know me, what does he/she want?” Pick up your pace and carry on any conversation while walking, never bothering to stop. This way the person will more likely leave you alone.
Five. Avoid the temptation to run from four-legged animals.
A human can't out-run a healthy, active four-legged animal; therefore, it is better to stand still if you have nothing to fight off an attack. Allow the animal to sniff you, but avoid making eye contact.
Six. Keep out of alley ways.
Although this is common sense, plenty of people walk in areas out of public view because they are short-cuts that lead to home. They are also a good place for criminals to hang-out for victims passing through with wallets and purses too.
You can stay safe when walking alone at night if you think through your path getting to your destination in advance. Don't set out walking if you have no idea where you are going. Whenever you can, do walk with someone. Try not to walk when you are intoxicated, because this will make you an easy target for a criminal to take advantage of you.
By Nicholl McGuire
10 Things to Teach Children Before Giving an Allowance
They come to you asking for the next new video gaming system. They want the toy they keep seeing on television commercials and all you can say is, “Children, I don't have the money right now maybe next time.” Why not say, “You can buy it. Save your money.” Teaching children about money doesn't have to be difficult.
One. Display all coins and dollar bills so that children can see and touch them.
Sometimes we are spending cash or using debit and credit cards so frequently that the children never see nor feel the money. Without seeing the money or lack thereof, how can they appreciate it? Show them what each coin represents. Let them experience feelings of disappointment when money runs out. Provide them with a history lesson. Share with children the different ways people use money including: collecting, saving, and investing it.
Two. Interview the children to find out what they already know about money.
Do they know how money is made? Where it comes from? What do they like most about money? What do they like least?
Three. Provide them with word problems.
Give out money problems and challenge them to find solutions. For instance, there is a pack of gum at one store for one price and the same pack of gum is on sale at another store, which one will they choose and why? If there's a set amount of money for them to spend on their favorite items, teach them how to budget.
Four. Point out sale signs and show them how to use coupons.
Familiarize children with the savings they can take advantage of when buying simple things like gum, a magazine, toys and other fun things. They will be glad to get change back from those large bills that mom and dad give!
Five. Purchase a fun-looking savings bank and/or cash register with play money.
Toys like these help further educate children on the value of money. Pretend like you are a customer and your child is a cashier. Ask questions about your purchase and explain to them what each dollar and coin represents.
Six. Take them to the bank with you and/or show them what a bank account looks like (preferably one you have set aside for them.)
When you are taking the time to show them where money goes when you receive it and how you allocate your dollars, you are teaching them once again that money is not meant to be wasted and that each dollar has a purpose.
Seven. Teach them how to shop around.
Show them how much money they stand to lose if they were to shop for the same toy elsewhere. Once children understand the concept of money, they will not want to lose money, but gain more of it. When you show them that they can find a favorite item elsewhere for a bargain, not only will they learn a thing or two, but they will remind you to shop around too in the future.
Eight. Play game about managing money.
Children love games; so when you present them with a fun way to manage money, they will be more likely to remember simple concepts and later teach others.
Nine. Borrow money from them.
Periodically ask them for money and watch their response. Offer to pay them extra from the trouble. Teach them the pros and cons of lending someone money.
Ten. Show them why it isn't a good idea to gamble hard-earned money on games you are least likely to win.
Scratch-offs on the ground, old raffle tickets, and other games that consumers rarely win will also be a good teaching tool for your children. Point out that this is all money wasted on the ground. Explain to them that more times people lose than win when gambling money. Provide examples of the many people who are poor as a result of gambling money; rather than saving it. Avoid focusing on those who won by chance.
Lastly, after you have showed your children the value of money, create an allowance system. Start off with simple tasks and small payments for tasks completed. Then gradually increase pay as tasks become more challenging for them. Post a sign somewhere within your home for all to see displaying what the tasks are and how much they will be paid when they perform them. Make them responsible for keeping track of the chores they have completed. The sign could look similar to a time sheet—a great way to prepare them for a job one day where they will have to keep track of their own work hours and breaks.
When you take the time to teach children the basics about spending and saving money, you will help them grow up to be responsible with their money.
By Nicholl McGuire
One. Display all coins and dollar bills so that children can see and touch them.
Sometimes we are spending cash or using debit and credit cards so frequently that the children never see nor feel the money. Without seeing the money or lack thereof, how can they appreciate it? Show them what each coin represents. Let them experience feelings of disappointment when money runs out. Provide them with a history lesson. Share with children the different ways people use money including: collecting, saving, and investing it.
Two. Interview the children to find out what they already know about money.
Do they know how money is made? Where it comes from? What do they like most about money? What do they like least?
Three. Provide them with word problems.
Give out money problems and challenge them to find solutions. For instance, there is a pack of gum at one store for one price and the same pack of gum is on sale at another store, which one will they choose and why? If there's a set amount of money for them to spend on their favorite items, teach them how to budget.
Four. Point out sale signs and show them how to use coupons.
Familiarize children with the savings they can take advantage of when buying simple things like gum, a magazine, toys and other fun things. They will be glad to get change back from those large bills that mom and dad give!
Five. Purchase a fun-looking savings bank and/or cash register with play money.
Toys like these help further educate children on the value of money. Pretend like you are a customer and your child is a cashier. Ask questions about your purchase and explain to them what each dollar and coin represents.
Six. Take them to the bank with you and/or show them what a bank account looks like (preferably one you have set aside for them.)
When you are taking the time to show them where money goes when you receive it and how you allocate your dollars, you are teaching them once again that money is not meant to be wasted and that each dollar has a purpose.
Seven. Teach them how to shop around.
Show them how much money they stand to lose if they were to shop for the same toy elsewhere. Once children understand the concept of money, they will not want to lose money, but gain more of it. When you show them that they can find a favorite item elsewhere for a bargain, not only will they learn a thing or two, but they will remind you to shop around too in the future.
Eight. Play game about managing money.
Children love games; so when you present them with a fun way to manage money, they will be more likely to remember simple concepts and later teach others.
Nine. Borrow money from them.
Periodically ask them for money and watch their response. Offer to pay them extra from the trouble. Teach them the pros and cons of lending someone money.
Ten. Show them why it isn't a good idea to gamble hard-earned money on games you are least likely to win.
Scratch-offs on the ground, old raffle tickets, and other games that consumers rarely win will also be a good teaching tool for your children. Point out that this is all money wasted on the ground. Explain to them that more times people lose than win when gambling money. Provide examples of the many people who are poor as a result of gambling money; rather than saving it. Avoid focusing on those who won by chance.
Lastly, after you have showed your children the value of money, create an allowance system. Start off with simple tasks and small payments for tasks completed. Then gradually increase pay as tasks become more challenging for them. Post a sign somewhere within your home for all to see displaying what the tasks are and how much they will be paid when they perform them. Make them responsible for keeping track of the chores they have completed. The sign could look similar to a time sheet—a great way to prepare them for a job one day where they will have to keep track of their own work hours and breaks.
When you take the time to teach children the basics about spending and saving money, you will help them grow up to be responsible with their money.
By Nicholl McGuire
Make Your Child's Dream a Reality: Here's How
So your child wants to be the next president, entertainer, lawyer, doctor, firefighter or some other professional? What are you doing now to ensure that his or her dream is fulfilled? Oftentimes children will change their dreams, but there are always a few in the bunch that know what they want. How might you keep their dreams alive?
Ask questions and listen.
Children who really want something will nag you about it until they get it. Do you have a child that is annoying you about visiting a certain establishment or meeting someone who works in a specific industry? If so, you may want to follow up with a question like, "Why do you want to see him or her so bad? Do you really want to visit that building?" Keep a journal of the things your child says, so when he or she becomes older, you can remind him or her about his or her dreams. Ask specific questions to find out more about your son or daughter's dream. Find out if your child enjoys working with his or her hands, voice, feet, etc. Once you know what he or she likes to do, it will help you find out more about related professions based on your son or daughter's interests. If your child is old enough, have him or her take a questionnaire to determine exactly what is it that he or she likes to do if there is some uncertainty or if he or she seems to like to do too many things.
Collect information about your child's desired profession.
Purchase videos and instructional materials about topics related to your child's interest. From magazines to videos, take the information and make a game out of it. Question answer games will reinforce learning about the profession. Allow your child to also play a game of Show and Tell with what he or she has learned. Reward your child for his or her presentation.
Plan a trip to meet someone in the industry.
Maybe there is a relative or friend who wouldn't mind taking you and your child on a tour of their workplace. Call him or her and share your child's interest.
Seek classes in your local area.
Oftentimes there are special summer programs for children to help them become professionals one day. From acting classes to softball camps, find out what kind of classes are being offered in your area via the newspaper, Internet, local yellow pages, coffee shop, city office, school, and church bulletins. There are also many classes that are not advertised. So do ask others about children's programs as well.
Save money.
In order to make your child's dream become a reality, it will take money. So be sure you establish a savings plan that will go toward your child's future dream. Encourage other relatives to give to your child's fund; rather than buy them toys.
Mention what your child's desires are to the teacher at your next parent teacher conference or meeting with the school's counselor. Sometimes by getting a teacher or counselor involved in your child's future, you are reinforcing what it is that he or she wants to do. This person may know of some resources that can further help your child.
Share your child's dream only with relatives and friends that can help in some way.
Unfortunately, there are some relatives and friends that are negative and unsupportive about most things including parenting. Despite your child's enthusiasm about the family member who gave them their favorite toy, this person may not be so helpful about investing in your child's future. So be very selective who you talk to about your child's dreams and always address anything negative that they may say to your child.
Once you have started the task of building your child's dream, don't stop, even if he or she is becoming a bit tired of it. Rather, find other ways to keep your child interested. Your son or daughter may be more excited about his or her dream if he or she can see the dream carried out in a variety of ways. For instance, instead of becoming a veterinarian maybe they really want to work with animals in a circus, on a farm or somewhere else. It's still the same dream: to work with animals just in a way that might be less boring.
Sometimes parents can turn children away from dreams simply by becoming too involved. When you notice your child is beginning to act out or quite boldly says, "Mom this isn't about you!" Listen and back off. If your son or daughter needs anything, he or she knows how to find mom and dad.
A child will only give as much energy toward a dream as you allow. So if you choose to approach your child's dream half-heartedly with little or no support, your child may look to something else, then another thing, and still another thing until he or she wins your approval. Children do many things for attention sake, so give them the attention that they seek--be supportive.
By Nicholl McGuire
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